Journey on a Small Road: 2011-03-13

Friday, March 18

How to Deal with Adolescent Behavior

People who deal with adolescents often associate adolescence with something that has to be feared, or compare it to walking on egg shells. But that is really not the correct way to look at things. Many people don't seem to realize that adolescence is an age that is characterized of being a confusing time in a person's life. It is an age in which there are several physical, psychological and behavioral changes taking place in a person which happen due to the release of several hormones. It's therefore a time that is neither here nor there (neither a child, nor an adult) and thus there are bound to be times when dealing with adolescence can get to be extremely difficult. At such a time, the issue of how to deal with adolescent behavior can make way. To help you cope with this very situation, the following article will hope to help.

Coping with Adolescent Behavior

Teenagers are not something to be feared. In fact, one should aim at understanding them so that the solutions of dealing with adolescent behavior make way on their own through experience and understanding. If you need to get a peek into their psyche, understand what it means to be them and thereby learn how to deal with adolescent behavior, continue reading the remainder of this article.

Understanding Their Behavior
The first and foremost thing that needs to be done? Understand their behavior. This will automatically give you a heads up of how to deal with adolescent behavior. As we have already mentioned in the introductory paragraph of this article, teenage years are marked by changes in all spheres of their life, which they themselves are struggling with at most times. That is why, understanding that it is a difficult and confusing time for them will help you go easy on them and for the most part, prevent any sort of clashes.

Spending Time

Until and unless you spend time with them and learn to interact with them with a view to create a bond with them, you will never be able to get close enough to them. One, to understand them, and two, to let them know that you're there for them. If they view you as someone who does not understand them, then they are going to just close up with you around. Which you will find is a much more difficult situation to create for yourself. It has also been seen that spending quality time with them and giving them the proper time will help create a strong base for them to fall back on. It has been studied that people who have a strong home base are less likely to give in to peer pressure.

Talking and Sharing

How are they ever going to feel like you are there for them if they cannot view you that way? Give them a chance to get to know you. Talk to them about their day, ask them questions about the things that happened, the activities that were undertaken at school, the problems or difficulties that they faced, provide solutions where ever and whenever you can. Don't just stop there, learn to share things about your day and life with them as well. In time, they will learn to view you as their confidant and learn to share their activities with you. There is no better condition than this to be in because you know exactly what is happening in your child's life.

Support and Respect

Many parents try and take their children's decisions for them. One needs to stop doing that and allow them to take their own decisions. Even at times when you know that their decision is probably wrong or is going to cause them pain, you have to let them learn from their own mistakes. If you keep hounding them about things, they are going to stop telling you things and that just means that you are creating more and more adolescent behavior problems in them.

Providing Space

Don't overdo the bit about wanting to be there for them as their friend. Remember that you're their parent first. Leave them be with their own age group because they are learning important skills by being with others their own age. Just let them know that you are there for them for whatever they need you.

Observing Them

Teens might not always tell you that they are going through a rough time at school (and believe me there will be many like those). It is your duty to keep a keen eye and notice these things for yourself. Notice if they have suddenly gotten quiet, or have lost or gained weight, they have lost their appetite and are generally portraying behavior that is not like them. If you observe any of these adolescent behavior disorders, it could mean that they are going through depression or something similar and they need your help.

Being Strict When Required

As a parent it is your duty to teach them the important values and lessons of life. Spelling out the rules of the house, warning them about social evils and peer pressure and having an action plan ready for when they fail to adhere to rules is also important. Very, very much so. Why? 'Coz these are the values that they are going to take with them in their adulthood. Also, since teens do not always know the consequences of their behavior and what it spells, it is possible for them to take you for granted. Which is exactly what you need to stop because it is not going to help them any in the future.

Adolescence can get to be extremely scary and daunting for some - both parents and kids. And while there will be those certain erratic behavior patterns at times, understanding teens and helping them understand themselves is one of the best ways in which one can deal with this period better. Here's hoping that you do a great job at parenting your adolescent children.

The Type of Woman Men Fall in Love With

Men are attracted to women that have:

1. Intelligent - This attribute ranks very high, after men have gotten past your looks. Men love women that are smart, opinionated, and articulate. Most enjoy speaking to women who have their own point of view on subjects and are passionate in discussing affairs of the day. Men love to debate, and if you can make them believe, or at least respect, your point of view, then you have a man that will see you as an equal, and not as an ornament to be displayed to the rest of the world until the next best ornament comes his way.

2. Good Humored - If you can laugh at your man's crude jokes or take his wisecracks, you become someone he wants to get to know better. But if you're the type that easily gets upset when he jokes about your raggedy hair or sloppy dressing, men will not find your personality as attractive as one who possesses this quality.

3. Confident - When you have your own opinion and can defend it, are comfortable in your own skin, regardless of your body size or whatever else Mother Nature has thrown your way, then you have what it takes to attract men that will fall head over heels in love with you.

4. Supportive - Men find it easy to fall in love with women that encourage and support positive undertakings they embark on. Men love women that have the ability to see what they see in the goals they pursue. Men believe that when you support their dreams and goals, you believe in their ability to accomplish those things that are dear to their hearts. And when you support that which is dear to a man's heart, you essentially have the key to unlock his passionate love for you.

5. Accommodating - When you understand that men are not perfect, and you are able to easily forgive them for their imperfections, then you possess one of the most admirable qualities men seek in their love interest. However, if you are the type that will nitpick every single thing they do or nag them at the drop of a hat, then you will not have a man hanging around you for very long.

6. Patient - This attribute is quite similar to that in #5. When I speak of patience here, I am referring to a woman's ability to be in a relationship with a man without pressuring him into making a serious commitment he may not be ready to make. Now understand that there is a way to let a man know that you are interested in settling down, without coming across as desperate or overbearing. Women that show men that they are willing to wait for them to propose a committed relationship are apt to be more attractive to men than those that come across as impatient.

7. Sensual - A woman that is not sensual is not attractive to any man. To be attractive to a man you must be perceived as someone who is very comfortable with her sexuality and knows how to initiate sex spontaneously. If you believe that men should always be the first to make the move when it comes to bedroom and lovemaking matters, you may be doing yourself more harm than good when it comes to your ability to attract men. Improve your ability to initiate intimacy, and you will see how much more attractive you will appear to your guy.

8. Honest - Men find authentic and honest women quite attractive. If you are the type that tells it like you see it, men will find this aspect of your personality very attractive. "Say what you will do and do what you say" ought to be your motto. Just as you respect and love men that tell you the truth no matter what, men feel the same way when they meet a woman that does not waste their time with fibs. In a nutshell, men are attracted to women that are honest and down to earth, women that do not pretend to be who they are not.

9. Open-minded - The willingness to explore other possibilities, new ideas, etc. is an attribute that men seek in the women they want to love. Being open-minded does not mean that one has to compromise one's personal convictions, but rather is able to see another point of view and respect it, even if it is not one that you share.

10. Health conscious - Women that take care of themselves are generally more attractive than those that do not. After all a good physique is the first thing that attracts men, even before they get to know how wonderful and exciting you are. Men are attracted to women that exercise, eat right, take care of their hair, nails, and dress well. To attract the best you must look your best - it is that simple.

6 Sign's He's Thinking of Splitting Up

Guys aren’t known for initiating relationship conversations — which is why when they do break things off, it often seems like the bomb was dropped out of the blue. But experts say dudes actually do give away certain clues when they’re not feeling it anymore. Pay attention:

He overloads at work. When a relationship seems to be heading south, guys often tend to take on more on the job to compensate; it gives his ego a boost since he’s likely upset that things with you are floundering. Plus, if he needs space, work is the one place you’re guaranteed not to be.
He’s stops inviting you to hang with his friends. When you first became a twosome, he wanted his bros to meet you (and be jealous that he scored such a hot chick). But if he’s thinking you and he aren’t meant to be, he’ll start having more boys’ nights sans you so his pals know that you’re on the outs and will support him when the breakup backlash hits.
He keeps convos neutral. Notice you’re discussing things like the news and the weather a lot more lately? These topics aren’t intimate, and they’re a sign he may be distancing himself to have less of a bond with you, so his feelings aren’t murky when he does the deed and it’ll make for a cleaner break for him.
He boxes you out. Say you’re watching a movie together on the couch and his body is angled away from you—he’s sending you the message that he doesn’t feel intimate. At all. A guy who’s super into you will want to touch and engage you when you’re hanging out. If he’s not? His body language essentially takes over, blocking you out to convey that he’s feeling miles apart.
He stops texting you the stupid little stuff. Guys usually text on a gut impulse—whatever they feel, when they feel it. When that stops, it means he doesn’t really feel the need to send you the nice little check-ins he once did just to say good-night or to let you know he’s thinking of you.
Cuts off the PDA. When he kisses you or holds your hand in public, he’s telling the world that you’re together—which he won’t want to do if he’s anticipates being single soon. Whether he’d act on it or not, he’s subconciously demonstating to any potential future interests in the area that you two are on shaky ground.